Change.

I have 2 hours before i have to head out to LAX and taking this time to work a bit on a few items. Im sitting in a coffee chop i frequent, listening to Sting in the headphones and watching as a 10 year old girl sits with her dad drinking a frapacino. The man has white almost beige colored hair, in his late 30’s maybe early 40’s and hes looking outside the window as each car passes by. Shes swinging her feet back and forth, too short to touch the floor.

I think i was swept up again by the commotion. I hate to say it but I think that is what happened. At least i noticed it early, slowing down to analyze thats happening around me, and think about how this is affecting me. Things like this make you ignore real issues at hand and deal with them to a final resolution.

Humm. When im on the road I look at the traffic zooming by or I passing it by. Sometimes traffic creeps up and i realize if i slow down a bit I can move to the next lane and go a bit faster. I feel thats the same with life. I feel that i was stuck going 100mph didnt see what was happening and now need to slow down and realize what I was getting myself into.

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“You care what others have to say about you” not in those exact words but none the less they were spoken to me. I asked my gf if that was the case and she blurted out, “oh god yes” . Her reason? Because I ask her to turn down the tv, not talk so loud while were in the house, or I refuse to talk when someone sits near me. I think those arent reasons. Does a person need to have the TV up so loud i can hear it outside? No. Does a person need to talk at a tone where my ears hurt? I dont think so, maybe im sensitive. Honestly, I just don’t like to be rude to our neighbors and care if they are comfortable in their own homes. I think it all stems from the constant reminders not to walk so hard when i was growing up and living in a 2 story apartment.

The talking in public…yes thats true I dont like people sitting next to me and having them ease-drop my conversation. I do it to people ALL the time so im sure they are doing it too. Do i care what people think of me? Yes, but I think everyone cares to some extent. Do i care more than the other person, no. I attribute this to the neighborhood I grew up in. The environment that I grew up in didnt lend itself well to that. If I wanted to get to where I am now, listening to what others had to say about me would have derailed me at a very early age.

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The biggest gripe? During my elementary school days i wasnt that smart. The average grade was a B with many more C’s 🙂 It wasnt until I met a girl who taught me how to cheat. She was the quietest person in the class, never spoke to me at all. I said hi once. She smiled and said, “Look! *points to the table” . I looked and their in plain pencil were all the answers to all questions for that days exam. My jaw dropped. I laughed and she became my best friend. From that point on I straight A’s. At some point everything just started to click in and I stopped cheating and things just came naturally. I loved anatomy and bio stuff and it was great to know that I didnt have to study for it since i just enjoyed it so much everything just stayed in my head. At this point I was the A student in the class and had about 10 awards per month when a school wide assembly was done. It got so good that the principle asked me to conduct the pledge of allegiance. That was cool! I got nervous infront of 300 kids so yea…lol

Anyways. What I hated. I was the A student, even after i stopped cheating
There was a contest that fall, the teacher had to chose the best student in the class. I knew I was it and knew i was going to get those tickets to disneyland. What happened? A kid which got an A but always had F’s got them. The lesson? Be mediocre and shine when it counts. people remember them not the ones that constantly achieve.
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On the drive to LA i started to think about JARVIS, the Iron man computer. I want to build one. I started to build it in my head and ran into a problem. This thing will need a knowledge base. A set of information that it can use to construct assumptions and give me feed back. When i started to think of the human brain I pictured a web of neuron and then abstracted that out and thought about web pages and how those represent the neuron. Why not use the web to formulate knowlege (yes very old concept) but how to give that data meaning? Even if you had tons of GOOD valuable information how would you give it meaning to a computer. How can a computer say, “What im looking at is a sales receipt for a car that Armando bought 3 days ago. he now has X amount in his account so he cant realistically go on vacation”. Easy RDF, Semantics. *Sigh im back to this again. I just need to start.

Its 12:36am. My parents have my book in a case 🙂

Armando Padilla – “the coffee got cold…i like it better this way”